InnExperience – Innovation goes bananas!!

I’ve been getting this crazy urge to write a book. I’m hoping it will make me famous – isn’t that what a book is supposed to do for its author anyway. And I’m going to be innovative like the rest of them authors. The title? Innovation of course. It’s going to be a cakewalk I know, since I have all the basic ingredients.

Copycat

So here’s my book recipe. In the beginning I’ll talk about nebulous concepts and indirectly accuse the reader for being so ignorant. I’ll tell her what she already knows and hide behind some easy facades. To succeed at innovation, you have to be creative, I’ll tell her. Creativity, for as far as I can see, means simply to be different from the rest. Doesn’t matter if you create any value or not, you must speak with authority, wear something outlandish, pierce your ears and other parts of your body, throw sarcastic glances at lesser beings and have some pictures of you appear while at a fashion do. It’s really that simple.

In the next chapter, I’ll talk about the basic concepts of innovation. Patents, R&D improvements, process optimisation, software tools, collaboration, disruption – I need to do this to add credibility to my claims as the author of a book on innovation. If readers haven’t seen through other authors, I won’t get found out will I?

Having laid the foundations, I can now preach about the value of innovation and build some theoretical frameworks (read fancy graphical templates). I’ll  bring in business jargon to validate that innovation is the need of the hour and how it will be our saviour in these times. Words like Strategy, Culture, Processes and Growth will sound quite impressive to the readership. They always have!

And now for the best part of my book writing strategy. (Remember, I will need a publisher.) So here’s what I plan to do. I’ll spend a few months ‘compiling’ the references by surfing the Internet and put together a Bibliography citing from already famous authors and institutions. That way I’ll know which are the best ‘hooks’ to piggyback on. For example, if I slipped in references of Walmart’s innovative business model, Peter Drucker’s quotes on innovation, Nandan Nilakeni’s future project and also requoted some famous innovation authors’ books, I would have a surefire formula to target the bestseller list. These days, to be original, you don’t even have to hide your sources. Sometimes it helps to be upfront about plagiarism because nobody would suspect you. How innovative is that?!

Context? Who said anything about my being responsible for context? It’s your context isn’t it? My job is only to write and it’s your job to figure out how to apply my thoughts to your contexts.

So dear readers, please point me to your publisher friends. Any publishers out there that are reading my blog may send me an advance to write yet another book on the hackneyed topic of innovation. Because I’m all ready to write a book. Minor issue that I have nothing new to add. Writing is all about style anyway!